Info, advice, and inspiration for your affordable, inclusive, and beautiful wedding
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Stressful though it may be, planning a wedding can also be pretty fun! Researching vendors, getting to know who they are and what they offer, and learning about the many ways to throw an awesome wedding has been an overall positive experience for my upcoming wedding.
One thing that has caused a little stress, however, is finding queer-friendly wedding vendors. My partner is queer, as are people in our wedding parties and invited guests, and we’re both adamant about only allowing vendors that are fully affirming and supportive of LGBTQ people be a part of our wedding.
Making this happen in Texas caused us both some nerves. Asking vendors if they’re queer-affirming in a state known for its hostility to non-cishet people is intimidating–something no one should have to experience when planning what should be one of the happiest days of their lives. If you’re a wedding vendor that welcomes LGBTQ couples and wants to ensure they feel safe contacting and booking you, below are four action steps that will go a long way:
1. Don’t hide your love!
Are you down with queer couples? Great, now say so!
My partner and I were so relieved when two of the vendors we loved replied that they’re cool with queer folks–but really, we shouldn’t have had to ask. Be loud and clear on your website, social media channels, and anywhere else you maintain a public presence that you’re inclusive and down with queer couples!
2. Feature LGBTQ couples!
If you’re a vendor that maintains an online photo gallery and/or shares photos via social media, feature LGBTQ couples! It was strange hearing from vendors that they *did* welcome queer couples–and that they’d worked with queer couples in the past–to then visit their website and social media and see not one visibly non-cishet couple. The message I got from that was, “We’ll take your money, but won’t acknowledge you exist.” And that’s…not okay.
3. Keep your contact form gender neutral.
This is such a simple, great thing to do! I pretty much *knew* that we’d hire our photographer when I saw his contact form used gender neutral terms. You can use “You” and “Your partner’s name” instead of “Bride” and “Groom,” for example, to keep your contact form gender neutral.
4. Ask pronouns–and give your own!
If you’re an individual, such as a photographer, makeup artist, or wedding planner/coordinator, include your pronouns in your email signature, on your website About page, and on social media profiles! This is a great indication that you’re not assuming anyone’s pronouns and understand the importance of respecting people’s gender identities. Asking the pronouns of the couples you’re working with also ensures they don’t have to correct or explain themselves to you–you’ve already done them to courtesy of asking.
Are there any other tips you’d suggest to help vendors be more approachable for LGBTQ couples! Let me know in the comments!